April is Sexual Assault Month

Each month more than ten women of all ages and backgrounds contact our Adoption Center with the same experience- they have been victims of a date rape drug, and are now pregnant … most of the time not knowing who got them pregnant. Just after Spring break, is a time when we see a peak in pregnancy. For many of these women a date rape drug was involved.

The U.S. Census, suggest that there may be 32,101 annual rape-related pregnancies among American women over the age of 18. With the adult pregnancy rate associated with rape estimated to be 4.7%.

Several college aged women have reported waking up in frat houses or apartments with no clothing on, finding themselves in strange surroundings with unknown people, or having actually been sexually assaulted while under the influence of a date rape drug.

Just recently our 18 yr old daughter shared her plans to celebrate her graduation with some girl friends in Cancun. Concerned with their safety and still wanting them to enjoy themselves. This prompted me to ask her- Do you and your friends know what rape drugs are and how they are used? Surprising she had heard very little on the topic, as most of the women that call us don’t know either and wish someone had shared the following information.

Rohypnol is becoming the drug of choice for would-be rapist’s .Most all predators target unsuspecting victims by slipping these illicit drugs into their beverages at parties, bars or nightclubs and dances. Rape drugs have the power to make one drink feel like six or more.

Laura a sophomore from Florida was one such call. Laura who attended a private party off campus recalls she was dancing when she feels it was when she left her beer that the perpetrator laced her drink. She recalls she only had one drink and started feeling kind of sick, then my memory got foggy, I started feeling drowsy, really dizziness, confused about where I was. My roommate was going to come with me to the party , but at the last minute she make other plans, I decided to go alone, which was my first mistake. She has no memory of what happened for the next 8 hours.

She woke up in a back room, in the club with bruises on her thighs, half naked and suspected that someone may have had sex with her, but couldn’t remember who the person was or any other details. . She was hung over for days afterward.

Laurie blocked the whole incident from her mind and allowed a numbness to take over her feelings. Her grades fell and she found her mind wandering in class.

This is not uncommon for women that have been raped. This can be used as a defense mechanism against being overwhelmed with feelings or losing control and are common reactions to what has happened to them. Others become anxious or depressed.

In Laura’s case she discovered 6 weeks later she was pregnant, she dropped out of college to have the baby and chose to have him adopted by a childless couple though our adoption center. “It was the only way I could make something good out of something so bad, I needed to do something positive and it wasn’t the child’s fault”

Laura recalls when she first found out how angry she was and scared, “I wouldn’t have sex with a guy I didn’t know. I have always been so careful of what I do and who I date. I was just so mad at myself for not being more careful, I didn’t know if I had contracted a disease or HIV, it was very scary and embarrassing”

Toni was 19 yr old victim of a date rape drug in her freshman year in San Diego, during spring break. Assaulted at a party by a friend she met in a class and had known for almost a year. She kept saying “I considered him one of my best friends. He acted like he would protect me. I couldn’t believe it. I couldn’t believe it actually happened to me, even now.

My body has been violated, my trust in him as a friend has been shaken and I feel betrayed… I keep saying to myself, “I know him, and he’s not a terrible person – so it must have been something I said to him or did that got me into this mess.” I don’t remember and I keep trying to remember what I did, or said – what happened that night- my own judgment has been stunned!

“I just couldn’t go through with an abortion after what happened- as hard as the pregnancy was for me, I have always believed there are no mistakes and this baby didn’t cause this and should not be the one that suffered, I had done the suffering, abortion wasn’t the answer to my problem” It took some time, but I chose a family that I knew would love this child no matter what. Even through the rape something came good out of it. Not what I had ever dreamt of when I started college. “I have never regretted giving birth and giving her life” I still have trouble trusting people, but am working on it.

According to the U.S. Department of Justice, “Date Rape”, is one of the fastest growing drug-facilitated, sexual assault crimes in America today. Two thirds of GHB is ingested by people aged 18-25 years old. And Ecstasy abuse has increased 500 percent over a five-year period.

Studies confirm that acquaintance rape occurs more commonly among college students, predominantly first year students, than among any other age group. A recent large study, found one in four college women reported being the victim of rape or attempted rape and 84% of their assailants were boyfriends or acquaintances. Most victims remember nothing of the incident except that the feeling of being violated. The same study found that one in four college men disclosed to having used sexual aggression with women, and one in twelve to committing sexual assault of some kind. These men will slip the drug into a woman’s drink without their knowledge, most often in combination with beer, and wait for the drug to incapacitate the woman before sexual assaulting her. The assailants would go to parties to look for easy targets and opportunities and wait until the victim is too out of it to say “no” and then will have sex with them. Many men do it just to take advantage of women sexually. !

The drug is often added to punch or other open container drinks at fraternity parties, college functions and social gatherings, where it is reportedly given to female party goers in hopes of lowered their inhibitions and facilitating in a potential sexual conquest for the assailant. High risk situations are clubs, parties, bars, and raves. Women contacting us are of all backgrounds and ages. Many are still in some shock over being pregnant and are not sure of the race of the man than raped them, and have little to share about the “father” of their child.

The date rape drugs are often referred to as the “alphabet drugs” called “E” or Ecstasy, “G” which can be either GHB or GBL and “K” or “Special K” which is Ketamine. For a while Rohypnol or “Roofies” was one of the most popular date rape drugs, but it has been replaced by GHB as the date rape drug of choice. The most popular date-rape drugs are (GHB) gamma hydroxybutyrate and ketamine. The “date rape” drug or “sexual assault” drugs is the street name for Rohypnol because it has been associated with date rape. GHB is produced in clear liquid, white powder, tablet, and capsule forms. It is also been known common as: Rophies, Roofies, Roachies, Forget Pill ,R2, roofenol, Roche, circles, La rocha, Rope, Trip-and-Fall , Liquid X, Liquid E, G-Juice, Rib, Mexican Valium, Roach-2, Roopies, and Ropies, Mind-Erasers, Liquid Ecstasy,” Somatomax , Scoop, or Grievous Bodily Harm.

Ketamine Also known as “K”, “Special K” or “Vitamin K”. Commonly comes in a liquid form, but is also found in powder or pill forms.

Rohypnol is not legal in the US, nor is not manufactured or sold legally in the United States. It is used as a short-term treatment for insomnia in other countries. It is produced and sold legally by prescription in Europe and Latin America, then smuggled into the United States by mail or travelers smuggled it in. The drug is often distributed on the street in its original “bubble packaging” which creates a false appearance of legitimacy and makes it appear to be harmless and legal. Rohypnol tablets are white, scored on one side, with the word “ROCHE” and an encircled one or two indicating the dosage on the other. Rohypnol is a low-cost drug, often less than $5.00 per tablet. They are sold in sealed bubble pack of one or two mg doses.

Rohypnol can be addictive and cause physical dependence. It has physiological effects similar to Valium but is nearly ten times more potent. Withdrawal symptoms include headache, muscle pain, confusion, hallucinations and convulsions. Some women have had seizures occur up to a week after cessation of use.

Rohypnol can often be dissolved in a beverage, and is easily undetectable.

Ecstasy Also known as MDMA and is known on the street as Adam, XTC, E, M, Bean, and Roll. Ecstasy comes in a tablet that is often branded; a few samples are shown below:

In combination with alcohol, it can induce a blackout with memory loss and a decrease in resistance. Women as young as 13 throughout the country have reported being raped after being involuntarily sedated with Rohypnol. Roughly ten minutes after having the drug in her system, women report feeling dizzy and disoriented, at the same time feeling too hot or too cold or both, some become nauseated. Sedation starts appox. 25-30 minutes crest within two hours, with effects continue for up to eight hours. The drug has no taste or odor. Victims don’t have any memories of what happened while under the drug’s influence. The woman can appear extremely intoxicated, with slurred speech or experience difficulty speaking, gastrointestinal disturbances and urinary retention, poor coordination, swaying, blood-shot eyes, decreased blood pressure, and then she passes out….but without the odor of alcohol.

Vicky was 19 when she came up pregnant – she had no physical signals of rape, she woke up in her own bed and therefore had no reason to be concerned. She assumes that she had too much to drink although she doesn’t remember the previous night’s events; she thought a friend must have helped get her safely home. She was shocked to discover 2 months later that she was pregnant. I hadn’t had sex for over a year, and bought three pregnancy tests before going to a clinic for a blood test. She chose to keep and raise her child with the help of her family. In here words “having the baby bought peace and healing to my life”

Alcohol and Rohypnol combination is intensified and very hazardous together. If a woman is drinking alcohol when the drug is slipped in her drink, the combination of, their effects on her memory and judgment are greatly impaired. A woman who become intoxicated on a combination of alcohol and Rohypnol often experience “blackouts” lasting eight to twenty-four hours following ingestion making her unable to resist a sexual attack. If combined with other drugs the results may lead to respiratory depression, aspiration, coma and even death. Possession of Rohypnol is punishable for up to three years in prison and a fine. Distribution and administration of this rape drug without the person’s knowledge is punishable by twenty years in prison and a fine.

By taking the preventive measures to protect yourself, your friends, you can avoid becoming potential victims. Print this article out and give it to friends you know … it may save their lives.

Besides the worries of unprotected sex, sexually transmitted diseases she ….

Your best defense against rapists and rape drugs is awareness.

Here are a few helpful tips for staying aware, alert and safe:

” Be careful about accepting drinks from anyone you don’t know well or long enough to trust. The best choice not to let anyone fix you a drink, Offer to mix the drink yourself. Carry the drink yourself.

” Don’t share or exchange drinks with anyone.

” If you are accepting a drink, make sure it’s from an unopened container and that you open it yourself.

” Never accept drinks from individuals you do not know and trust

” Do not drink from open containers at parties and accept drinks only from bartenders or servers, watch them open the can or pour- don’t be distracted by conversation.

” If dancing, don’t leave your drinks unattended. If you realize your drink has been left unattended, toss it out.

” Consider buying a specially designed drug testing coaster- see below to test your drink for the drug. They are low-cost and a smart choice

” Remember any kind of beverage can be drugged- there is no taste or smell.

” If possible bring your own drinks to parties when possible, Don’t drink from a container that is being passed around

” If your drink tastes or looks differently than it should or tastes “funny” or salty, foamy, cloudy, or if it has residue in it throw it away

” Don’t go to parties alone; travel in a group of people and stick together at a party. Look out not only for yourself, but keep an eye on your female friends.

” A really good idea is to not let your friends get too drunk or wasted. If they do party intensely, take them home, staying with them to make sure they are all right before leaving.

” Don’t let your friend disappear and don’t let them wander off with a member of the opposite sex, stay by their side. Don’t leave with someone you do not know well or have just met.

” Don’t put your drink down and leave it unattended, even to go to the restroom. Monitor your drink constantly.

” Refuse to drink from a punchbowl; this is a place where anything can be dropped in.

” Stay sober. Don’t use drugs or alcohol; you need to have a clear head at all times.

” Assign a designated sober person when going out.

” Notify other female friends you know about the effects of this dangerous drug.

” Be observant to the behaviors and actions of your friends, trust your instincts.

” Listen for the street names of the drugs mentioned above.

” Keep a cell phone with you and charged up in the event you have a problem and need help.

Remember You Did Not Deserve What Happened To You

And the Assault Was Not Your Fault.

” If you think that you have been a victim, notify the authorities immediately if you or someone you know has been sexually assaulted, you can file a police report.

” Get immediate medical attention. Call 911 or go to an emergency room. Request that a urine sample be taken to screen for the presence of date rape drugs.

” Preserve as much physical evidence as possible. Don’t urinate, shower, bathe, douche, or throw away the clothing you were wearing during the assault. If possible, save any other materials that might provide evidence, such as the glass or can that held your drink.

” Call a crisis rape center for information and support.

All women are potential victims of sexual assault: regardless of there age, race, sexual preference, occupation or education. A woman can be assaulted by a stranger, by a friend, by an acquaintance, co-worker or relative.

Q. How will I feel after an assault?

There is no “correct” way to feel after an assault. Be aware that different people need to heal in their own ways. Some women may need to talk about the assault a number of times to heal; in working through a difficult experience- reliving the violation. Seeking a professional familiar with date rape can make a big difference in recovery.

Some women find their faith in God may be strained but find strength in keeping their faith and attending church or synagogue helpful. Other women find the answer may be involvement in activities to help forget. Then when they are better able to handle the facts and face them can they find peace to work through the pain.

Finding a qualified rape counselor or participating in a closed group counseling with other women, who understand what you are going through can be healing in itself. Many women who have been victims of the date rape drug have some or all of the following reactions:

” Anger and frustration

” Disbelief and Denial

” Guilt/ Self Blame

” Helplessness/ Confused

” Avoidance of Friends

” Feeling Paranoid

” Difficulty in Concentrating

” Change in Sleep Patterns

” Sexual Disinterest Or Change in Sexual Behavior

” Can’t Stop Crying Or Can’t Cry

” Inability To Cope With Ordinary Situations

” Problems With Trust

” Depression

” Frenzied involved in their Work

” Low Self-Esteem

” Reoccurring Nightmares

” Changed Alcohol Or Drug use

” Wanting To Forget, Escape OR never get out Of Bed

” Eating Everything Or Nothing At All

As you work through the healing process, keep these suggestions in mind:

” It is not your fault – you are not responsible for the unwanted sex.

” You are not the guilty party.

” Some people may try to make you feel responsible for what happened because of their own feelings of vulnerability or guilt.

” That you may have been intoxicated does not give anyone the right to assault you – nothing gives anyone that right.

” Acquaintance rape happens because the rapist fails to respect the victim’s individual will, not because of irresistible arousal.

” A rapist acts without regard for the victim, so saying no or even physically resisting cannot always be enough to prevent the assault.

How to Help a Friend Who Has Been Assaulted….

” Let her make decisions. Offer to make phone calls for information, but don’t take over for her. She has just had control taken away and needs to regain it.

” Don’t touch her without first asking permission. Say, for example, “Would you like a hug?” or “Would you like to hold my hand?” A caring touch can help the victim but unwanted touching can be very uncomfortable or even threatening.

” Don’t blame her. Questions like “Why did you go home with him?” What were you thinking of? Will only reinforce her sense of guilt or shame.

” Let her know she is safe, and that you won’t violate her trust.

” Try to deal with your own reactions to the circumstances later. You may feel angry, helpless, confused, or violated yourself. Keep in mind that your friend probably feels all that and more, so seeing your reactions may not help her. Try to focus on her feelings. Later, when her immediate necessities are taken care, is the best time for you to take care of yourself and seek out a counselor. A sexual assault can be distressing for friends, land family members, as well.

Drug testing drink coaster Singles bars have never been risk free, but so-called date-rape drugs give you one more reason to be cautious. After a friend was attacked by a man who may have spiked her drink, Francisco Guerra developed a cardboard drink coaster that can identify two of the most popular date-rape drugs: gamma hydroxybutyrate (GHB) and ketamine. Just place a drop of liquid on the coaster, and rub it in with your finger. If the spot turns blue, toss that cocktail. Fifteen million of these coasters have already been distributed; look for them at 7-Elevens

http://www.drinksafetech.com/ about 40˘ a coaster

More helpful Resources . . .

National Institute on Drug Abuse

Phone: (888) NIH-NIDA

http://www.nida.nih.gov/NIDAHome1.html

Rape recovery site

http://www.come.to/raperecovery

American Council for Drug Education

Phone: (800) 488-3784

http://www.acde.org

Hope for Healing

http://www.hopeforhealing.org/

Support for people conceived through rape and incest.

http://www.stigmatized.org

American Society of Addiction Medicine

Phone: (301) 656-3920

http://www.asam.org

Association for Medical Education and Research in Substance Abuse

Phone: (401) 444-1817

http://www.amersa.org

National Institute on Drug Abuse (Rohypnol and GHB)

http://165.112.78.61/Infofax/RohypnolGHB.html

State Directory for Offices of Victim Services

US Department of Justice

For assistance in accessing local Victim Services:

http://www.ojp.usdoj.gov/ovc/help/state.htm

includes a clickable US State Map

Mardie Caldwell, C.O.A.P. is the founder of http://www.LifetimeAdoption.com. An award-winning author of http://www.AdoptingOnline.com and http://www.adoptionstepbystep.com and a radio talk show host of http://www.letstalkadoption.com with Mardie Caldwell. Nbultanishaturl4
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To become a successful real estate investor, it’s critical that you become a good negotiator. This is a lifelong learning curve, of course, but you can never go wrong by studying the negotiating process and improving your techniques.

The bottom line for successful negotiation is: get what you want by giving sellers what they want. There are some basic rules you’ll want to learn–and then follow religiously–when you enter into a negotiating situation.

The first one is that you can only negotiate with someone who is actually willing to negotiate. If a seller has no real motivation to sell a piece of property, there is little that you can do to increase your position in the process. If there is nothing they particularly need, there isn’t anything you can offer that will fill that need. If you run into sellers who are in this position, it may be best to simply walk away and move on to the next property.

Non-motivated sellers have dominated the real estate scene in 2005, and many homes have actually sold for above the listed prices, since there has been a glut of buyers who have bid prices up. In such a seller’s market, the chances of negotiating a genuine bargain decrease. However, 2006 looks as if the market will begin to shift, especially with rising interest rates, which will lessen the number of qualified buyers and may send housing price downward.

When you’re looking to fill the sellers’ needs, there are several questions you’ll want answers to, either from the sellers themselves or from other sources, such as real estate agents, escrow companies, or public records. For instance, you’ll want to know why the sellers are selling their home at that time? There are as many reasons as there are sellers, but until you know their individual circumstances, you won’t know how you can offer to help them toward their next move.

Although it will often be difficult to obtain from the sellers themselves, you can often find out what the original purchase price of the home was, which will give you a good feel for their equity position. This will give you leverage in your offering price, knowing how much the sellers will walk away with at closing.

Knowing the sellers’ time deadlines can also be critical to successfully negotiating a purchase of their home. The shorter the timeline, the more leverage you’ll have in putting together a successful purchase.

It’s also important to determine if the sellers have gotten a profession inspection done on the home. This can be vital in getting a feel for how much repair the home will need before you’ll be able to sell it at a profit. Don’t guess; it can be deadly to your bottom line! However, using these negotiating techniques can put you well on your way to becoming a successful real estate investor.

Copyright © Jeanette J. Fisher

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Toronto, my city of birth, is the largest city in Canada with a population of about 3 million (5 million in the greater area) and it keeps growing every year as it seems to be the first city of choice for immigrants from around the world. With over 100 languages spoken here, Toronto is the most multicultural city in the world according to the United Nations. This is actually a good thing since Toronto can be a model for the rest of the world in regards to showing how it is possible for different people of many different cultures and faiths to get along peacefully. Friends of different racial backgrounds and religions can be found here where they would probably be enemies in other parts of the world.

Having lived in Toronto for most of my life so far, I’m always amazed on how the city has grown as a tourist destination. Torontonians seem to take world class attractions like the CN Tower and the Skydome for granted since many see it every day during their commute. Of course, the CN Tower is a very worthwhile visit as a ride to the top is a must for every visitor.

Toronto has one of the best redeveloped harbourfronts anywhere. This area has boutiques at Queen’s Quay, restaurants, cafes and galleries. Nearby Ontario Place and the Canadian National Exhibition are annual favorites among locals. This is also where one takes the ferries across to the Toronto Islands. The islands are all connected via bike paths and offer a unique view of the Toronto cityscape as well as a nice break from the busy downtown. Located on the main island, Centreville is a petting zoo and small amusement park for kids.

The action is downtown and probably where most tourists should stay. Although the hotels prices are higher in downtown than the suburbs, Toronto traffic is unfortunately not getting any better so it is best to stay where commuting is kept at a minimum. There is a very efficient transit system for those who want to stay outside of the downtown area though. A walk along Yonge Street near the Eaton Centre mall will reveal the wilder parts of Toronto life. For the latest trends, Queen Street West is where the funky boutiques and bars are. For upscale shopping, go to Bloor Street between Yonge and Avenue Road as well as the Yorkville area.

Toronto is a live theatre town, second to perhaps only New York or London. The theatre district on King Street has a lively after theatre scene including restaurants and clubs. During the day, the world renowned Royal Ontario Museum, Art Gallery of Ontario and the Planetarium showcase treasures from around the world (as well as out of the world). Many also come to see the Hockey Hall of Fame.

Toronto has Canada’s largest Chinatown. Actually, the growth of the Asian population has resulted in four different Chinatowns in the greater area. The main one is centered around Spadina and Dundas. The dim sum in Toronto is one of the best outside of Hong Kong since most Chinese immigrants here were originally from Hong Kong. Other ethnicities are also represented by such districts as Little Italy, the Greek Danforth area and many others. For outdoor markets, the Kensington and St. Lawrence Markets are great. Since Toronto is so multicultural, it is an excellent place to try out different cuisines.

For animal lovers, the Metro Toronto Zoo northeast of the city is world famous and will take an entire day to see. During the summers, Canada’s Wonderland is a family oriented theme park just north of the city. Niagara Falls, one of the natural wonders of the world, is just ninety minutes away and worth a day trip or even an overnight stay. There are just too many things to see and do in the Toronto area to mention in one article. Vancouver has the ocean and mountains while Quebec City has that old European touch. But to see world class live theatre and Canadian multiculturalism at its best, Toronto is where it’s at.

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A medical school is an institution that teaches medicine and trains its students into becoming successful medical practitioners. Different medical institutes across the world provides quality education in the theoretical as well as practical aspect of the medical training. Some of the most renowned institutions include the Cincinnati Medical School, Caribbean Medical School, Arizona medical schools, and Mayo Medical School. The entry criteria in all of these medical schools vary considerably, ranging from the eligibility criteria including grades obtained and co-curricular activities undertaken. But with a properly filled out medical school application a medical student can seek admission in various medical schools in Canada and the United States of America.

There are a number of medical school applications through which medical aspirants can seek admissions in different medical schools across the globe. Some of the commonly used application forms that are most sought after for gaining admission in a medical college have been listed below:

* AMCAS – American Medical College Application Service
* AACOMAS – American Association of Colleges of Osteopathic Medicine Application Service
* TMDSAS – Texas Medical and Dental Schools Application Service
* OMSAS – The Ontario Medical Schools Application Service

Through the American Medical College Application Service, prospective medical aspirants can seek admissions in different medical schools in Canada and the U.S. The AMCAS is a service regulated by the American Medical Colleges Association. AMCAS acts as a common application among the various medical schools.

The American Association of Colleges of Osteopathic Medicine Application Service (AACOMAS) offers the medical aspirants a very convenient and centralized medical application service for the recognized medical schools and it is provided online. In this online application service, students can submit one electronic application. After verifying the application, the AACOMAS distributes the information inscribed by the applicants to the different medical schools selected by the students. The admission in an Osteopathic medical school is very competitive and the different schools select their candidates from a very large chunk of the highly qualified students. It is advised to apply very early in order to get your information processed without being delayed.

The Ontario Medical Schools Application Service is a non-profit application service. It is a very convenient and centralized application service for seeking admissions in one of the six Ontario medical schools. They are namely:

* Michael G.DeGroote School of Medicine, McMaster University
* Queen’s University
* Schulich School of Medicine, University of Western Ontario
* University of Ottawa
* University of Toronto
* Northern Ontario School of Medicine.

Hence, those who wish to apply for the Ontario Medical Schools have to submit only one set of information with regards to their qualification and regardless of the number of the medical schools they wish to apply for.

Similarly, for taking admission in a Texas medical and dental school, there is Texas Medical and Dental Schools Application Service through which applicants can apply to different medical colleges or schools in Texas.

Sandra Stammberger owns and operates http://www.medicalschooladmission.net Medical School AdmissionsTanishaturnball1
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